Shame, Power, and Pathological Demand Avoidance in Children and Teens with Dr. Gillian Boudreau | Ep. 172

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1. 

   S1 · E177 · 25 Aug 2026 · 49 min

   One Year Later: Justin's Story of Progress With His PDA Son | Ep. 177

   What does a year of applying the PDA lens actually look like in a real family? Justin joined the Paradigm Shift Program in the summer of 2025 and is back a year later to share what shifted, what is still hard, and what he has learned along the way. Justin is a father of two, works in cybersecurity, and lives in Ohio. His 13-year-old PDA son spent years in a specialized school before school refusal led the family to unschooling. In this episode Justin shares how he tracks his son's indicators using an app he built himself, how he navigated the screen time question through the 4S Framework,…

2. 

   S1 · E176 · 18 Aug 2026 · 18 min

   Basic Needs and Pathological Demand Avoidance: Toileting, Sleep, Hygiene, Eating, and Safety | Ep. 176

   When I first started learning about PDA six years ago, so much of what I encountered was focused on behavior. What I was not seeing discussed was something I kept observing in my own family, and have since seen in thousands of families I have worked with: the way cumulative nervous system activation can disable a child or teen from accessing the things they need to stay alive. In this episode, an excerpt from the Understanding PDA Masterclass, I walk through what basic needs struggles actually look like across five domains: toileting, sleep, hygiene, eating, and safety. I share why I…

3. 

   S1 · E175 · 11 Aug 2026 · 23 min

   Throwback: Is Pathological Demand Avoidance the Same as Autism, ADHD, or Anxiety? | Ep. 175

   There is a lot of noise in the PDA space right now, and some of it is making parents doubt themselves and feel more confused rather than less. So I am re-airing this episode from May 2025 because I think it will help you feel more confident in the path you are on. In this episode I share a story from a feeding support group that crystallized for me why PDA is a distinct experience, not one that can be folded into autism, ADHD, or anxiety strategies without losing something critical. I walk through two examples of content I have seen in the PDA space that would have sent me spiraling five…

4. 

   S1 · E174 · 4 Aug 2026 · 18 min

   Why You're Walking On Eggshells: Cumulative Nervous System Activation And Your PDA Child Or Teen | Ep. 174

   Seven years ago I created a huge spreadsheet trying to find the cause of my son's meltdowns. How many hours outside, how many minutes on screens, how many calories eaten, and much much more. But I couldn't find a consistent pattern. Something that triggered him one day might be barely noticed another. The problem was, my logic was wrong. In this episode, an excerpt from our free Understanding PDA Masterclass, I explain why the standard ABC framework of antecedent, behavior, consequence fails for PDA children and introduce the cumulative nervous system activation model: how drops build in the…

5. 

   S1 · E173 · 28 Jul 2026 · 18 min

   Finding Meaning as a Parent of a Pathological Demand Avoidance Child or Teen | Ep. 173

   When autonomy is low, meaning has to be high. That is what I learned during the two years I spent as a full-time caregiver for my older son, isolated in our home, and putting myself physically between him and his eighteen-month-old brother when things got bad. In this episode I share how I found a sustaining "why" during that period, and how other families I have worked with have found theirs. I also introduce a practical tool I call the "hang your hat on the day" goal: a way of redirecting from goals that depend on another person's behavior to goals that are entirely within your own…

6. 

   S1 · E171 · 14 Jul 2026 · 11 min

   Why Lowering Demands May Not Be Enough For Your PDA Child | Ep. 171

   If you've lowered demands for your PDA child or teen but still aren't seeing much progress, this episode is for you. It explains one of the most common sticking points I hear from families: that due to the name - Pathological Demand Avoidance - parents focused on lowering demands, when what their child needs more is increased autonomy and equality. This episode is an excerpt from my free Understanding PDA Masterclass. In it I walk through the distinction between demands as a surface-level behavior and autonomy and equality as the root-level mechanism. To help make the difference clear, I…

7. 

   S1 · E170 · 7 Jul 2026 · 17 min

   Using the PDA Lens to Change Your Parenting With Pathological Demand Avoidance | Ep. 170

   This episode is an excerpt from a lesson inside the Paradigm Shift Program. I'm sharing it because the PDA lens is the foundation that all other skills in my work rest on, and it is not something most parents are going to hear explained anywhere else. In this lesson I walk through exactly what the PDA lens is, why it has to be learned as a skill rather than just understood intellectually, and how to begin applying it. I also address the most common thought that comes up when I introduce the concept of deliberately signaling equality: am I training my child to be a bad adult? And why the…

8. 

   S1 · E169 · 30 Jun 2026 · 53 min

   Addictive Behaviors and the Nervous System in PDA: A Conversation With Jan Winhall | Ep. 169

   When I first heard Jan Winhall speak about the intersection of the nervous system and addiction, I immediately thought of the PDA teens and adults in our community who are reaching for substances or engaging in self-harm. In this episode she explains how addiction and self-harm function as nervous system state regulation strategies, what conventional models get wrong, and what it actually looks like to support someone through this from a place of safety rather than shame. Winhall brings a wealth of knowledge to the conversation as a trauma and addiction psychotherapist, developer of the Felt…

9. 

   S1 · E168 · 23 Jun 2026 · 22 min

   Understanding the Root Cause of Pathological Demand Avoidance and Equalizing Behavior | Ep. 168

   In this episode I share the definition of PDA I use: PDA is a survival drive for autonomy and equality that consistently overrides other survival instincts, including eating, sleeping, toileting, hygiene, and safety. I explain how this is different from older definitions that consider PDA to be anxiety driven, and why that distinction matters clinically and practically. I also I introduce the concept of equalizing - the behavioral expression of the disability that extends well beyond demand avoidance into physical, verbal, and relational patterns that can look like manipulation, control, or…

10. 

    S1 · E167 · 16 Jun 2026 · 50 min

    Individualized Education Plan (IEP) Advocacy for Pathological Demand Avoidance with Dr. Destiny Huff | Ep. 167

    If you are a parent who cannot unschool or homeschool your PDA child, or who needs practical support navigating the school system, this episode is for you. I am joined by Dr. Destiny Huff, a licensed professional counselor, non-attorney special education advocate, and neuro-affirming trainer who is also late-diagnosed autistic and ADHD and a mother of neurodivergent children. Dr. Huff shares the most common patterns she sees as PDA families navigate schools, how she frames the nervous system lens in IEP meetings, the specific accommodations she advocates for most consistently, her approach…