Make it rare to make it special

0:03Speaker 1:Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeartRadio. Good morning. This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's tip is that things that happen rarely in life tend to feel more special. So if you want to preserve that feeling that something is a treat, do it a little less often than you otherwise would. Today's tip was partly inspired by my recent interview with Elizabeth Dunn and Jiaying Zhao, co-authors of the book Leave the Lights On.

0:43Speaker 1:This book is about small and generally happiness-inducing ways to make environmentally friendly choices. Liz and Jay Z noted that eating steak is a particularly carbon-intense activity, but you don't have to give your steaks up. you can use the principle of the hedonic treadmill to make sure you really enjoy those steaks that you do choose to eat. The hedonic treadmill is the phenomenon where anything we do frequently becomes a little less pleasurable because of the frequency. By doing something a little less frequently, we can preserve that feeling of specialness. A great steak dinner at a restaurant once a month might be more exciting than burgers and other red meat four times a week. And you might be fine with eating chicken more frequently as a weeknight meal instead of beef. That doesn't feel like a huge trade-off.

1:43Speaker 1:So it goes for anything in life. I was thinking of this as my family is recently back from our annual beach trip. I love the spot we visit on the Jersey Shore. We have rented the same house for eight years in a row now, often for two weeks. I really look forward to those two weeks. I am sad to see them be over. And so I ponder each year that maybe I should try to spend more of my summer at the beach. Maybe we should buy a place there. But I know that part of the reason these two weeks are so magical for me is that they are only two weeks. I treat those days like little jewels. I am quite sure I wouldn't do that if I was there all the time. While we are at the beach, we often get ice cream at one of the ice cream parlors in town. For years, it was just at one place, and now the town has several options that we have been trying. We eat a lot of ice cream in two weeks. But I almost never go to ice cream parlors outside those two weeks.

2:50Speaker 1:So scooped ice cream in a cone remains a treat for me. Maybe you have something like that in your life that you really enjoy. Now, you could make it a regular component of your life, and sometimes that is the right answer. If you enjoy getting together with a particular friend, I would suggest doing that more often rather than less. There is no need to worry about the time becoming less special. Indeed, the more you hang out, the more things you will have to talk about. It will be great. But for other things, keeping them a little more rare than you theoretically could can keep them in the category of fun treats. Maybe you only order a drink when you are out at a restaurant or bar, and you don't drink alcohol at home. Maybe you only have dessert once a week, and so it really feels like a treat for you, and not just like it's Tuesday night and Wednesday night and Thursday night and so forth.

3:51Speaker 1:When things are rare, they feel special. And we can choose how often we indulge, with an eye toward keeping that special feeling, rather than losing it. In the meantime, this is Laura. Thanks for listening. And here's to making the most of our time. Thanks for listening to Before Breakfast. If you've got questions, ideas, or feedback, you can reach me at laura at lauravandercam.com. Before Breakfast is a production of iHeart Media. For more podcasts from iHeart Media, please visit the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.