Podcast · Stories

Oz 9

by Gated Galaxies · English · Stories

It's Spring 2142 (a Tuesday), and Gated Galaxies has launched its 400 Oz-8000 ships, each carrying 50,000 "resting guests" to, hopefully, a new home on a shiny, brand-new planet. Except this whole "terraform and take over" idea isn't actually the plan; the real plan is far more nefarious and involve

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New episodes: Every two weeks
Typical length: 29 min
Latest: 13 Sep 2026
Language: English

Latest episode

13 Sep 2026 · 20 min

BONUS: The Garden of God's Retirement

So, turns out our horny —sorry, "horned" — romantic Pluto has siblings. And like all siblings, they're annoying, disruptive, omniscientish, and likely to go darting off through space at something approaching light speed just to show off in front of YOUR girlfriend. Ok, those last two might apply more to Pluto's sibs than yours. Whatever the case, they hog all the ambrosia, snap your privates with a lightning bolt when you least expect it ... yeah, I hear it, that might be more Pluto's sibs than yours too, but you get my point — annoying.And like all siblings, they expect all the plebes to…

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Earlier episodes 29 most recent

S7 · 29 Aug 2026 · 26 min
Interviews with yer ever-lovin' Crew: Aaron (heeeeee's baaaaaaaaack)
It's frankly annoying how much y'all have missed this guy (and yes, we get it, we missed him too). "When's LBF coming back?" We heard you cry. "Bring back the Frounch dude!" FINE.The silly meter just shot from 11 to infinity and you've no one to blame but yourselves.And of course, we're offering our standard apology to France and all French-speaking peoples and areas of the world for our continued and downright gleeful butchering of your glorious language and its many accents. All of which appear to be rolled into this one guy.Seriously, I just watched a parrot on TikTok who NAILED IT. But…
S7 · 24 Jul 2026 · 43 min
Interviews with yer ever-lovin' Crew: Pete (we love that guy)
First, if you haven't listened to Mission: Rejected, seriously, do you read these notes EVER? We've mentioned that show a brazillion times, so just GO LISTEN ALREADY. Look, I'll even make it easy for you: here is their website (https://www.missionrejected.com/). Here it is on Apple podcasts (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mission-rejected/id1454748884) and on Spotify (https://open.spotify.com/show/5uhNkMlYaJmIg1GZU5LCl2?si=f62f29bb30cf4df3). There! Anything else I can do for you? Make you a sandwich, perhaps? Dust off your dainty toesies? Sheesh. Second, this is Sarah Golding and Pete…
S7 · 23 Jul 2026 · 29 min
Interviews with your ever-lovin' Crew - Kevin
Hmmmmmm? Wazzat? Oh, hello, are you still here? Goodness, you are patient. Yes, season 7 is still in the works. Here's a little something to tide you over until it splooches messily into your timeline.This is one of those silly conversations between the glorious Sarah Golding and poor Kevin Hall (Greg, Felonius), who has died on Oz 9 more than anyone else, although not recently which may mean he's overdue.Ignorance Was Bliss podcast by Kate Wallinga who is most desperately missed: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/ignorance-was-bliss/id1341566170 See Privacy Policy at…
S7 · 2 Jun 2026 · 1 hr 1 min
Interviews with yer ever-lovin' Crew: Tim and Chrisi
More 9ers because let's face it: little in life is as satisfying as someone else's world spiraling utterly out of control as they get deeper and deeper into a festering bog-swamp of bad decisions and regret.Tim has an excuse -- it was hard to see at the beginning how truly ridiculous this train wreck was going to be. Chrisi joined up after it was abundantly clear that was a bad idea. We can only attribute it to pie-eyed optimism. Anyway, listen up as Tim Sherburn (Colin and Emily) and Chrisi Talyn Saje (Julie) attempt to explain how they got entangled in all this nonsense. See Privacy Policy…
S7 · 1 May 2026 · 1 hr 2 min
Interviews with yer ever-lovin' Crew: David and Bonnie
Well, I'd say the fun never ends with this crew, but in truth, empires have risen, fallen, risen again, fallen again, and risen a third time to cries of "good god, will you just stay dead" and we're all still waiting for the fun to START. But these two are modestly entertaining, if you're feeling relaxed, have some good wine, and have recently been on the sharpish end of an icepick to the brain.Just... listen. What else are you going to do? It's not like you have pressing business to attend to, now is it?It's Sarah Golding, chatting with David S. Dear (and Dr. Theo Bromae ((*swoon*)) and…
S7 · 12 Apr 2026 · 51 min
Interviews with yer ever-lovin' Crew: Eric and Shannon
Who doesn't want to spend more time being utterly confused by the Idiots of Oz 9? Don't answer that. PUT YOUR HAND DOWN.Sarah Golding, who has zero time left in her busy days, couldn't resist adding one more spicy meatball to her heaping plate and decided to interview the cast and characters of Oz 9, in no particular order.First up: the Perry siblings — Eric Perry, plus his alter egos of Joe (JESUS!), Dr von Haber Zetzer, Mr Southers, and Howard. Then Shannon Perry —accompanied as ever by the cough-syrup-induced twin hallucinations of Olivia and Captain Madeline. Enjoy. Ish. NOTE: Interested…
S6 · E120 · 15 Feb 2026 · 36 min
episode one hundred & twenty: That volcano outside Hveragerði
We assume our title will send tens of you dashing to Google Translate or similar to check Joe's [Jesus!] pronunciation, so spoiler alert, he's spot on. Or not. Apologies to Icelanders. So.... 120's out. That's a thing we finally did. With it, season six concludes and begins its long trudge toward inevitable oblivion. But with goats, so it's not so bad. Stay tuned for a special announcement at the end, and no, I'm not going to tell you here or even give you a hint. LISTEN TO THE SHOW. That's why we made it. Sheesh! I will give you one spoiler, though: the volcano is a red herring. For now.…
S6 · 27 Jan 2026 · 3 min
Check out Hard Drive!
Hey, no one can accuse this crew of good taste in food, decoration, home furnishings, friends, leisure pursuits, career choices.... You get my point. But there is one thing we know REALLY well, and that's good entertainment, particularly good science fiction. So trust us when we say, LISTEN TO THIS TRAILER. Voyage Media, who brought us Sanctuary, are at it again with Hard Drive, a story about inheriting someone's memories - and what happens when memories of your grandpa "courting" grandma aren't the most horrifying things in there. Priah Ferguson (Stranger Things) stars in this thriller…
S6 · E119 · 28 Oct 2025 · 29 min
episode one hundred & nineteen: Chain-smoking nut-bag bum-pouch
NOTE: follow us on Bluesky (@oz9podcast.bsky.social) or join our Discord channel (https://discord.gg/4zXBRxH) for updates on our End of Season Six Live Listen! Right, don't tell your parents we suggested this, but we kinda think the title of this episode would make a hell of a Halloween costume.... Ahem. The away ship is basically nestled in the Oz 9's armpit, the ship's assassin is expiring faster than yesterday's dairy-based leftovers on the back seat of a hot car, the crew have to figure out how to hijack their own ship without weapons, strategy, or sufficient intellect to stay out of a…
S6 · E118 · 9 Oct 2025 · 30 min
episode one hundred & eighteen: Easy, M Night Shamalamadingdong
Hello? <tap tap> Anybody out there? Oh, yeah, hey. It's been a minute. Soooooooo... where were we? <deep breath> Right. When last we left our crew, they had managed to make it on the Maggies II and III and blast off from Planet Bob. Just barely before Planet Bob sort of ... blasted. Now that word feels funny. Blasted. Question is, did the ships and their contents survive the explosion? Well, considering this episode is, what, 26 minutes long, I'm gonna go with "probably," or this is gonna be a hella awkward silence. If Nattertop and Phil, the spiders aboard Maggie II and III respectively,…
S6 · E117 · 26 Aug 2025 · 26 min
episode one hundred & seventeen: New respect for gerbils
Yes, you read that title correctly. We have a profound respect for gerbils up here and won't hear a word against them. If you take issue with that, or indeed with Rodentia in general, well, we would remind you that the characteristic that defines Rodentia is a "single pair of continuously growing incisors in each of the upper and lower jaws,"* so let THAT keep you awake at night. And that podcast you heard at the top of the show? Mission: Rejected. Make sure you check it out and give it five stars and all that good stuff. You’ve been listening to: Pete Barry as Bob Tim Sherburn as Colin and…
S6 · E116 · 10 Aug 2025 · 24 min
episode one hundred & sixteen: No narration after meanwhile
Look, when your life is in the hands of someone who only recently gave up huffing glue, you keep your will updated and hope for the best. Such is the situation our four guests find themselves in, but hey, they agreed to be part of this season of I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Off This Toxic Planet, so on their own heads be it, really. Dr Theo (swoon) has sabotaged their escape "plan" for purposes that are hazy at best and really f*&king stupid at worst, and now the crew are stuck on a planet that's trying its celestial best to kill them. Will they survive? More importantly, will IaCGMOTTP be…
S6 · 3 Aug 2025 · 30 min
Oz 9 recommends: Who the F**k Killed My Sister
Y'all. Y'ALL. Ok, we've given you no reason to respect our judgment, but we're not wrong on this one. Sure, OK, we were wrong about the forniculator — yeah, that's not a thing — but we're right about this. You are going to LOVE this show. WTFKMS is super-smart, funny, and moves faster than Olivia making fun of Madeline's math skills. Give the episode here a listen, then trot on over to your podcatcher of choice to binge all eight eps. Do remember, please, to subscribe, rate, review, and share. It's a nice wee gift for the creators. :) Find it here: whothefkilled.com Learn more about your ad…
S6 · E115 · 27 Jul 2025 · 25 min
episode one hundred & fifteen: Are you...twerking?
Stuck on Planet Bob where pretty much everything is awful all the time, the crew is freezing and desperate for a safe place to ... well, to screw up, if their past is any indication. Huddled for warmth, buffeted by high winds, they suddenly hear the faint sounds of laughter and applause. Because of course they do. You've been listening to: Tim Sherburn as Colin and Emily Introducing Caden Dowgin as the Director Introducing Emmet Dowgin as the Assistant Director Bonnie Brantley as Jessie and Donna David S Dear as Dr Theo Bromae Kevin Hall as Greg Introducing John Dowgin as Gritz Eric Perry as…
S6 · E114 · 26 Jun 2025 · 32 min
episode one hundred & fourteen: Cigars, piles of meat, and someone else's liquor
The crew are tramping aimlessly across the blistering and occasionally freezing surface of Planet KTAALNS (Kill Them All And Leave No Survivors, otherwise known as "Bob") and things are pretty grim. Like, not even Brothers Grimm, more Quintuplets Grimm, plus a few singles and a couple sets of Twins Grimm. Just very very grim. I mean, they might survive, but even if they do, they're going to smell really bad, and does anyone need that right now? You've been listening to: Bonnie Brantley as Donna and Jessie Tim Sherburn as Colin and Emily Mark Restuccia as C4 from the Best in Galaxy podcast…
S6 · E113 · 1 Jun 2025 · 31 min
episode one hundred & thirteen: Into the clown car, y'all
Have you ever been invited to a party you really REALLY didn't want to go to? Like, you won't know very many people, you're not sure how to dress for it, and the atmosphere is toxic? But you're being frog-marched by an army of ants onto an away ship, so you don't really have a choice, and you're sure the chances of getting anything decent to eat are hovering at slightly below zero? Yeah, well, welcome to our world. Planet KTAALNS (Kill Them All And Leave No Survivors, or, affectionately, "Bob") awaits our bedraggled little crew, and it looks like this particularly party is going to be their…
S6 · 11 May 2025 · 3 min
Check Out Hit Singles
Brought to you by the team that brought you Wolf 359, you know it's going to be good. Faith Adler has crossed the country to spend the summer in NYC. There she meets David, and the two of them quickly get mired in ... something. It's complicated. Together with friends Tori, Matt, and Ginah, Faith and David navigate situationships, friendships, found family, and all the messiness of being young. Faith is a DJ, and that pretty much describes how she approaches life — willing to scratch, skip, mute, sample, and even reverse until things start to make some sort of sense. If you love Community,…
S6 · E112 · 27 Apr 2025 · 24 min
episode one hundred & twelve: Don't piss off your narrators
I'M SORRY, WHAT? HANG ON, LET ME GET TO A QUIETER PLACE, JUST A SECOND.... Phew. That's better. Things have gone bananarama aboard the Oz 9, and the crew has spent the last few hours trying not to get dysentery or squashed crossing a digital freeway. A few folks are hanging out in Meanwhile, which is basically a Narrators' Neverland with a few extra lost boys, and someone keeps trying to stick a fish in my ear. You're welcome to join the fracas, if you really want to, but wear a helmet and avoid Wiggy. He's an asshole. You’ve been listening to: Pete Barry as Bob Tim Sherburn as Colin Bonnie…
S6 · E111 · 6 Apr 2025 · 25 min
episode one hundred & eleven: There's a bulldozer outside
To everyone who responded to our blurb writer last time, they've been sacked. I mean ... does this look like message-in-a-bottle time? Using our show notes to get attention and complain about your job.... Seriously, we've no time for whingers 'round here- HA! April fool. Still me. It was lovely seeing some of you on the socials. I'd print out your comments, only I don't have a printer and the walls are too damp to post things on. Anyway, just wanted to let you know it's "spring" on the Oz 9, which means the bioswamp is in full flower and the mating calls of the egrets is deafening. The…
S6 · 31 Mar 2025 · 29 min
How I Died - It's to die for!
If you haven't yet discovered the podcast How I Died, you are in for a treat! A ghoulish, scary, maybe-listen-with-a-friend "treat," but yeah, a treat nonetheless!How I Died follows the story of forensic pathologist (NOT coroner) Jon Spacer. New to the oddly fatal place to live, Springfield, Dr. Spacer has an interesting super power: he can talk with the dead. Actually, that's not that impressive, hell, I can talk to the dead, but his super power is that when they talk back, he can hear them. So maybe that's the super power: he can hear the dead. OK, I'm getting a little sidetracked.Anyway,…
S6 · E110 · 23 Mar 2025 · 32 min
episode one hundred & ten: Hell bent for leisure
Once upon a time, there was a blurb writer who dreamed of the back of book jackets or maybe even the inside front flap, or the little bit of copy under the picture in a catalog, or a word or two like "stunning!" or "ribald!" on a film poster, oooo ooooo, maybe even on the inside first few pages of a novel, somewhere just under Kirkus Reviews.... But no. Instead that blurb writer does...this. Gives hints on a podcast episode you're planning to listen to anyway so you probably don't even read it. But here we are. You don't know this, but I'm also the…
S6 · E109 · 9 Mar 2025 · 32 min
episode one hundred & nine: That whole *spoiler spoiler* dead situation
Oooof, who cranked up the gravity? Feels heavy in here....It's spring in the bioswamp, as much as it can ever be "spring" in space. Things are flowering, other things are ... I dunno, fauna-ing? Whatever the case, it's a bit rude round there, so maybe don't take the kids in for another month or so.And NO, I am not tearing up, I'm in the bioswamp in spring, these are allergies, for crying out loud. Or NOT crying out loud, more crying inwardly, little hiccups of despair-Oh, forget it. You've been listening to: Pete Barry as Bob Ersat Shannon Perry as Olivia and Madeline Eric Perry as Joe and…
S6 · E108 · 23 Feb 2025 · 29 min
episode one hundred & eight: Playing Pluto's advocate
It's a Wednesday eve as I write this, and as I look out the porthole into the infinite recesses of space, I'm reminded how very small each of us is against the backdrop of eternity. Given how very very minute we are and how eternal space is, I have to wonder, how the actual f^&* is a crew member from the Oz 14 floating past my porthole just as I look out? I mean... what are the chances?! Nearly spilled my vodka tonic. Rude.You’ve been listening to... Pete Barry as Bob Tim Sherburn as Colin Bonnie Brantley as Donna and Jessie David S Dear as Dr Theo Bromae Eric Perry as Joe and Dr. von Haber…
S6 · 20 Feb 2025 · 27 min
Presenting Hannapocalypse
Hey, Space Monkeys. Have you ever wondered what happened to the earth Oz 9 left behind? I mean, I’m not saying we CAUSED the zombie apocalypse, but the math works out. (Sorry, Sweden)150 years ago, the zombie apocalypse apocalypted all over the globe, and now there’s robots and zombies trying to wipe out what’s left of humanity. Cali, a settlement scout, has big dreams but scarce resources who’s just trying to stay alive, and Hannah, well, she’s trapped in her zombie body, hoping not to eat anyone she actually cares about.Hannahpocalypse is a darkly funny story about love, fear, survival,…
S6 · E107 · 9 Feb 2025 · 26 min
episode one hundred & seven: Two went for the seljefløyte
-s the 1983 winner of the -nnu-l Dip your mittens contest, i -pplaud the l-rson brothers for their -m--ng skill -nd dedic-tion to the g-me.you've been listening to; pete B-rry as Bob Tim Sherburn -s Colin -nd Emily Bonnie Br-ntley -s Donn- -nd jessie D-vid S De-r -s Dr Theo Brom-e -nd Tiberius Eric perry -s joe, Dr von h-ber -et-er, mr Southers, -nd how-rd kevin h-ll -s Greg -nd Felonius Chrisi T-lyn S-je -s julie Sh-nnon perry -s m-deline S-r-h Golding -s mrs Sheffield S-r-h Rhe- W-rner as pipistrelle kyle jones is your n-rr-tor 2 Chris n-dolny Gourley is your n-rr-ator john F-ley is our…
S6 · E106 · 29 Jan 2025 · 28 min
episode one hundred & six: Is that a haddock?
So.... please take a close look at the episode art and tell me if you see anything funny? Mmmmm hmmmmmm. Apparently it took us a YEAR to notice. I blame all of you, frankly. You know what you did.You’ve been listening to: Pete Barry as Bob Tim Sherburn as Colin and Emily Bonnie Brantley as Donna David S Dear as Dr. Theo Bromae and Tiberius Eric Perry as Howard, Joe, and Mr Southers Kevin Hall as Greg and Felonius Sarah Golding as Mrs Sheffield Shannon Perry as Olivia Sarah Rhea Warner as Pipistrelle Kyle Jones is your Narrator Two, and Chris Nadolny Gourley is your Narrator. John Faley is…
S6 · 19 Jan 2025 · 31 min
BONUS: What's this I hear about an Oz 9 game?
It may not sound like it in the podcast, but life aboard the Oz 9 can be pretty boring at times. In the hiatuses (hiatusi?) between hair-on-fire moments, there's a lot of just puttering about in the inky void without much to do.So, we've been creating a game to while away the hours between crises.In this conversation, you'll hear us wittering on about this game and what it might eventually look like if we can scrape together the finances and the brain cells to get it out in the world.Keep an eye and ear out for more information and a chance to support us on Kickstarter! And yes, the next…
S6 · E105 · 24 Dec 2024 · 32 min
episode one hundred & five: Clara? Mein little Kartoffelpuffer?
NOTE: Stay tuned after the credits and all, for a trailer of a great new show: A Paladin's Bargain. You can listen to it in the usual places. You'll want to.Thanks as ever to Lucas Elliott for the new Narrators (or, Narrator and Tour Guide) artwork!It's Christmas eve as we publish this, and all of us monkeys wish all of you monkeys a very happy holiday season. We're hanging stockings over here (and about passing out from the fumes; just FYI space booties do NOT breathe) and hallucinating dancing sugar plums.We'd do some sort of look back over the past year, but ... let's not. There was some…
S6 · E104 · 7 Dec 2024 · 32 min
episode one hundred & four: #GreatSatansBoletes
YOU have a dirty mind. "Satan's Boletes" doesn't mean *THAT*. Although it does translate to "Great Satan's Fun Guys," so maybe it's still worth a giggle, as Mrs S says.Welcome to episode 104. Please put your tray tables and seat backs in the upright, we're-all-going-to-die position, because, well, it's Oz 9, and as usual, everything is trying to kill you.Let's just say our sound designer, dialogue editor, and voice actors pulled out ALL the stops on this one, so maybe dust off the old earbuds for a really good listen. I'd say it's "immersive," but y'all, you do NOT want to get immersed in…

About Oz 9

Oz 9 is a English stories podcast from Gated Galaxies. Melo plays each episode straight from the publisher's own feed — no ads added, no account needed — and remembers where you stopped, in this browser only.

Publisher: Gated Galaxies
Language: English
Category: Stories
New episodes: Every two weeks
Typical length: 29 min
Latest episode: 13 Sep 2026
Feed: RSS — paste into any podcast app
Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/podcast/id1446814974

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Oz 9

Latest episode

BONUS: The Garden of God's Retirement

Earlier episodes 29 most recent

Interviews with yer ever-lovin' Crew: Aaron (heeeeee's baaaaaaaaack)

Interviews with yer ever-lovin' Crew: Pete (we love that guy)

Interviews with your ever-lovin' Crew - Kevin

Interviews with yer ever-lovin' Crew: Tim and Chrisi

Interviews with yer ever-lovin' Crew: David and Bonnie

Interviews with yer ever-lovin' Crew: Eric and Shannon

episode one hundred & twenty: That volcano outside Hveragerði

Check out Hard Drive!

episode one hundred & nineteen: Chain-smoking nut-bag bum-pouch

episode one hundred & eighteen: Easy, M Night Shamalamadingdong

episode one hundred & seventeen: New respect for gerbils

episode one hundred & sixteen: No narration after meanwhile

Oz 9 recommends: Who the F**k Killed My Sister

episode one hundred & fifteen: Are you...twerking?

episode one hundred & fourteen: Cigars, piles of meat, and someone else's liquor

episode one hundred & thirteen: Into the clown car, y'all

Check Out Hit Singles

episode one hundred & twelve: Don't piss off your narrators

episode one hundred & eleven: There's a bulldozer outside

How I Died - It's to die for!

episode one hundred & ten: Hell bent for leisure

episode one hundred & nine: That whole spoiler spoiler dead situation

episode one hundred & eight: Playing Pluto's advocate

Presenting Hannapocalypse

episode one hundred & seven: Two went for the seljefløyte

episode one hundred & six: Is that a haddock?

BONUS: What's this I hear about an Oz 9 game?

episode one hundred & five: Clara? Mein little Kartoffelpuffer?

episode one hundred & four: #GreatSatansBoletes

About Oz 9

More English stories

Take it with you