Single moms

0:00Speaker 1:Hello everyone, Hello, Hello, Hello. I'm guessing the audio is working. It looks like everything is doing what it's supposed to be doing. I have my headphones here because we're going to be doing some reaction shit before we getting these questions. So I have over the last couple of days somehow have ended up on the manisphere side of TikTok and YouTube, where a lot of my content is men and women hating each other and a whole lot of stupidity. Today I watched somebody else react to a video and they had a very different take than what I had. So I went and found the video on TikTok, I downloaded it.

0:37Speaker 1:I want to watch the video. I want you guys to pay attention to verbage, and then I want to have a discussion about it because this video, had I followed this man's advice, would have prevented me from being with my wife, and this was my mindset before we actually got committed. So I figured it would be a good conversation piece. And then I have a document of questions that I want to get into. With that being said, it's Saturday. I hope you guys are having a good day.

1:04Speaker 1:The Patreon members that are hanging out with me right now. Thank you for rocking with me on a Saturday afternoon. I'm sure you guys had a whole bunch of other cool shit that you could be doing. So y'all are here, it's all that matter. So put these on. I'm going to pop over in the here we go.

1:22Speaker 2:Dating a single mother is one of the worst decisions that you could possibly make as a single man looking to have a successful, long lasting relationship.

1:32Speaker 1:All right, so before I go any further, I kind of agree with him. And this is gonna bother some of the ladies in the chat. I'm not trying to be controversial. I'm not trying to offend anybody. There's gonna be language here, and it's the language that matters. So I'm gonna back it up and I'm gonna play the beginning of this again just so that you guys can understand what I'm talking about by paying attention to the language.

1:51Speaker 2:Dating a single mother is one of the worst decisions that you could possibly make as a single man looking to have a successful, long lasting relationship.

2:01Speaker 1:Okay, so a successful long lasting relationship. The reason that a lot of men feel this way, depending on how they define success is that they have a proven track record of not being able to keep a family together right, And there's there could be a whole lot of reasons why that relationship didn't work out right. It could be an abusive situation. It could have been that there was no real relationship there, it was an oop since she didn't believe an abortion. There could be a whole lot of reasons as to why that relationship did not work.

2:33Speaker 1:From a surface level, without any of the information, we see that situation and we automatically think this is somebody who decided to have a child with another human being, they were incapable of making that relationship work, and now they're looking for another man to step in and raise that child. I'm not saying that that's what they're doing. I'm just saying that from a very initial assessment, without knowing any of the information, that is a pretty safe assumption statistic.

3:00Speaker 3:Right.

3:00Speaker 1:We're not throwing shade or blame because men who are just as guilty in this situation too, Because if it wasn't for men running around trying to fuck everything they could, this wouldn't be a thing, right, So this is not a blame thing. I just want you guys to be clear on that.

3:15Speaker 2:All right, moving on, especially if you are a single man in your prime years, which is we'll say thirty to about forty five years old.

3:24Speaker 1:I agree with this too. I agree with the prime years thing. Up until you're thirty years old, you don't have a real career. You haven't established any type of real life shit, are you guys hearing us?

3:32Speaker 3:Okay?

3:33Speaker 1:In the chat, I keep getting clicking in my headphones. Okay, you guys aren't getting clicking or anything. All right, all right, sorry, I'm just gonna play it.

3:48Speaker 2:You're at the right position of your career, your income is increasing, you have a stable business, and you choose yo dumbass chooses to date a single mother, someone who has made the ultimate decision, deciding to have a child, and then failing abjectly in that endeavor and ending up with a broken household.

4:10Speaker 1:Okay, again, this is one of those things where both people in this situation failed. And as somebody who there's gonna be a whole lot that we're gonna get into, I'm not gonna get into. I'm gonna try really hard not to get them ahead of myself. But both people in that situation failed just doing hotness. I love you, I'll see you get home.

4:29Speaker 3:You can.

4:32Speaker 1:I don't remember what he was saying because my wife just distracted me. So we're just gonna play it.

4:36Speaker 4:So let's talk about that.

4:38Speaker 2:If you're a man in his prime, investing your time, energy, and resources into dating a single mother bears almost zero ROI for you.

4:50Speaker 1:Okay, this is where things start to get real for me. He said that investing your time, your effort, in your resources bears no ROI for you. People who don't operate on a business level, or at least have some sort of business degree or real understanding is not going to understand what he's actually talking about here. Factually, he's correct. There is no real ROI in me investing in the children other than I get to be in their lives as long as I'm with their mother. My return on investment if I give my resources, my time, my energy, and I raise these children to the best of my ability while their father is still in their life or not, I am only I'm only in their lives as long as their mother permits. And in the event that we were to ever get split up or something was to happen, I would have no access to those kids. So in the event that I put both of these children through college, you can say, I'll say we just for the sake of argument, because what about her, right half of the everything is mine, you know, and the assets that I had before her are mine. So the time, effort and finances that I'm putting into putting these kids through college,

6:09Speaker 1:feeding them, raising them, boxing jiu jitsu, swimming lessons, speech lessons, all vacations, all of that shit, that money's gone. And though I get dope memories and I get to be a part of watching these young you know, these kids grow, you know, our son and daughter. I'm a bonus dad. I don't have a stake to claim to these children. So all of that is a complete waste of money from this standpoint when you're looking at it from a ROI, because again return on investment, we are talking about the financial aspect that goes into raising these children. If I raise these kids into adulthood, Peaches and I get along great, you know, up until they're in their thirties, and I end up in a retirement home, Peaches ends up with another man, and all of the raising that I've done for the thirty years that these kids were in my life.

6:58Speaker 1:They're not going to put me in a retire at home. They're not going to come visit me. I'll be lucky if I get a phone call from them after the two of us have split, because they're going to pick the loyalty to the parent. This is a very real conversation for a lot of fucking men when they start meeting single mothers, because it's a whole lot easier to support a woman than it is to support a woman that's got a whole bunch of baggage with them. And make no mistake, single men look at women who have kids as baggage. This is not a fuck you for having kids, because there's a whole lot of men out there who aren't raising their own children, let alone have the financial responsibility to take on somebody else's children.

7:31Speaker 3:Right, Let's get back to this in.

7:33Speaker 2:General, not in every single situation, but in general, the percentage chance odds are that dating a single mother is going to end with your demise and it's going to leave you at a deficit.

7:46Speaker 1:So if you again, guys, he is talking about your financial resources. This is not about emotional heartbreak. He is approaching this entire situation from a fiscal mindset, of financial mindset.

8:00Speaker 2:A woman who has a child by a man she's no longer with, You're probably looking at a woman who is potentially divorced, obviously separated, has a lot of mental, emotional and financial baggage and trauma.

8:15Speaker 4:On a biological level, she's.

8:16Speaker 2:Already been ran through by impregnated by this man, so her internal biology inside of her wound is actually more prime and receptive to having continued offspring with the man who impregnated her, who she had children by. His semen literally is implanted in neurons or in certain areas within the brain and as well as along the nervous system.

8:42Speaker 1:Okay, I didn't look this up. This is like the fourth person that I've heard talked about this in like the last two or three weeks, and every time I think to look it up, something comes up and I forget to look it up. If that's true, does that just mean that every woman, every man that has ever come inside of a woman has that scene thing with the semen and the neurology or whatever. He just said that, I don't know. I have no idea. I also didn't know that once you have a pregnancy with somebody that your body is more primed to continue to have kids.

9:12Speaker 1:So that could be complete bullshit. It could be internet science. I don't know because I didn't look this up. All right, guys, this is Chris from the next Day. I edited this episode last night. I listened to that part where they were talking about the DNA and the human matter male matter being caught in a woman's brain. However, he worded that, and I started doing some digging because I think it's bullshit, and sure enough, I could not find a single study that confirmed the narrative that's being stated. What I did find, according to Google, is that on the priming of the woman once being pregnant by a man, that is absolutely not true. That speaks to genetic imprinting. So Google said, a woman's body is not biologically primed or altered to have an easier time conceiving or carrying a baby with the same specific person in future pregnancies. There is no genetic imprinting. A partner's DNA or sperm does not change a woman's genetic makeup or permanently alter her reproductive system micro microchimerism. While cells from a fetus can cross into a mother's body and remain there for years. Cells from

10:21Speaker 1:a sexual partner semen do not integrate into her tissues or influence her future pregnancies. That one's super important because of the next thing I'm gonna get into independent pregnancies. Each new pregnancy starts completely fresh, hormones reset after delivery, and the body treats a new conception independently, regardless of who the father was previously. Now, there are myths called telegani, which believes that past partners affect future offspring.

10:50Speaker 3:It's been proven to be debunked.

10:52Speaker 1:All right, So let's go to an article on PubMed. This is from the National Library of Medicine. Okay, guys, so the other link and I'll post this in the description of the video if you want to go read the actual thing from PubMed. I am going to run this through AI to give me a summary so that I don't have to read you a really dry article of science, because I gotta be honest, it's really fucking boring and people don't want to hear it. So Summary of the male microchimerism and the human female brain from twenty twelve. This study explored a fascinating question can sells from a fetus remain in a mother's brain for decades after pregnancy. Okay, do you guys hear what I just said?

11:40Speaker 1:Can sells from a fetus remain in a mother's brain for decades after pregnancy the fetus not the male that she slept with the fetus? The answer appears to be yes. Researchers examined brain tissue from fifty nine deceased women, twenty six without neurological disease, in thirty three with Alzheimer's. They search specifically for male DNA by detecting a Y chromosome marker DYS one four, because women do not naturally carry a Y chromosome. Finding male DNA strongly suggests cells or genetic material originating from a male fetus, not a male partner.

12:16Speaker 1:A male fetus. What is a microchimerism microchimerism? During pregnancy, cells travel in both directions across the placenta. Fetal cells enter the mother's body, maternal cells enter the fetus. Most people assume that these cells disappear after birth, but previous research showed that they can persist for decades. This study asked whether those fetal cells could also be found in the brain. So the major findings of this article is that male fetal DNA was found in most women's brains.

12:45Speaker 1:The researchers found male mito microchimerism in thirty seven of fifty nine women, so sixty three percent. This means that nearly two thirds of the women had detectable male DNA somewhere in their brains. The cells weren't confined to one area. Male DNA appeared throughout the brain, including the hippocampus, temporal lobe, paralal lobe, singulate giros, ponds, medulla, thalamus, cerebellum, spinal cord. The medulla showed the highest detection rate, while some regions had detected had none detected, likely because some of the small number of samples available. These cells may remain for life.

13:25Speaker 1:The oldest woman with a detectable male DNA in our brain was ninety.

13:28Speaker 3:Four years old.

13:30Speaker 1:Women with Alzheimer's appear to have less microchimerism, it's not really relevant to the study. They detected it by using a PCR technique to amplify the Y chromosome gene to reduce false positives. They required detention in multiple wells, a minimum concentration before calling a sample positive and where do these cells come from? Pregnancy with a SUN is the most likely source. However, the paper notes the other possibilities miscarriage, abortion, a vanished male twin and older male sibling through maternal transfer, and blood transfusions. None of those say a male partner because pregnancy. Because pregnancy histories were incomplete, the researchers couldn't determine the exact origin of the male cells in every woman.

14:21Speaker 1:The study doesn't prove what the cells are doing, but it discusses several possibilities.

14:26Speaker 3:Tissue repair.

14:27Speaker 1:Other studies have shown that fetal cells can behave like simstem cells, differentiating into various cell types and potentially helping repair damage tissue immune surveillance. These cells may assist in detecting damaged or abnormal cells, including potentially cancerous ones, and brain function animal studies. Animal studies suggest fetal cells can become neurons astrokites.

14:52Speaker 3:I'm not even try that one, immune.

14:53Speaker 1:Cells within the brain, and whether this also happens in humans remains unknown. The The takeaway here is that this study overturned the long held assumption that pregnancy ends at birth.

15:04Speaker 3:On a cellular level.

15:05Speaker 1:It demonstrated that cells from a fetus can cross the mother's blood brain barrier, becoming widely distributed throughout her brain and remain there for decades, perhaps for life. What these cells actually do is still an open question. They may contribute to tissue repair, immune function, or other biological processes, but more research is needed before drawing firm conclusions. Perhaps the most profound implication is that pregnancy creates a lasting biological connection between mother and child that extends far beyond genetic or shared experience. At the cellular level, the child cells may literally become part of the mother's brain, persisting throughout much of her life. The child's, the fetuses, the fetal cells. Not once in this entire fucking study does it say a male partner. It may suggests that if a mom had a son before she had a daughter, that that daughter may already carry markers from having a son, because those DNA markers were in her body when they happened.

16:00Speaker 1:But there's nothing here that establishes what these people have been stating on the internet. Now, I did find another article because I wanted to be thorough and I didn't want anybody to be like, oh, well, what about this what about that? So before I get into this study, I have to be very clear. This comes from Cincinnati's Children's Research Horizons. Mom's ability to remember prior pregnancy suggests new strategies for preventing complications. This is a study in mice.

16:31Speaker 1:I did not find any studies in humans where this has been a thing. They are studying mice to get this information. I'll post a link in this one too, so I'm going to just scroll down to the parts that's relevant here implications for high risk pregnancy. While the new study is based on studying mouse models, the co authors say a body of research already exists demonstrating the cellular cross talk observed in the mice that also happens in humans. One emerging theory that requires further study is that a woman's immune system may also remember bad pregnancy outcomes and much the same way it remembers good outcomes.

17:12Speaker 1:The challenge will be to identify specifically what a mother's immune system retains from a pregnancy with a poor outcome. If we can isolate how those mechanisms differ from a healthy outcome, then we would have a target for developing improved treatments to improve outcomes. And high risk pregnancies. This also gets into vaccine research. The about the study here, it just gives all of the doctors. It gives a study information. It's on there. But this study basically says that, and this is from twenty twenty three. It's saying that scientists have known for decades that pregnancy requires a mother's body to adjust so that her immune system does not attack the growing fetus as if it were a hostile foreign invader. Yet, despite learning a great deal more about the immunology of pregnancy in recent years, a new study shows that cellular cross talk between a mother and her offspring is even more complex and long lasting than than expected by investigating how prior pregnancy changes the outcome of future pregnancies. This is why I copied the article because he's saying that they're imprinting on the woman and now

18:21Speaker 1:they're primed to have babies with that person. That's not true, that that implies genetic imprinting. Knowing that a woman's body changes once she has a baby to recognize that the fetus is not a foreign hostile invader, It's a very different conversation than what's being stated in these videos. By investigating how prior pregnancy changes the outcome of future pregnancies, or, in other words, how mothers remember their babies. Our findings add a new dimension to our understanding of how pregnancy works.

18:51Speaker 1:Nature has designed built in resiliency in mothers that generally reduce the risk of preterm birth, proclamsia, and still birth women who have had prior healthy pregnancies. If we can learn ways to mimic these strategies, we may be better able to prevent complications in high risk pregnancies and in addition, in addition to potentially making progress against the leading cause of infant mortality, Way says Way as a scientist, Way says, understanding how the immune system changes during pregnancy could influence other research fields, including vaccine development, autoimmunity research, and how to prevent organ transplant rejections. Gets into the way that moms remember their babies. You guys can read these articles if you want to. But there's nothing in here. I literally looked last night for over an hour. I found nothing.

19:40Speaker 1:I did not find a single actual PubMed National Library of Health article, did not find anything that indicates that there is genetic imprinting. I did not see anything about priming a fetus because you have a baby with a man. I didn't see anything that confirmed that our DNA or a sperm somehow ends up in the woman's brain. This is a narrative that has been twisted, sounds good, and has been regurgitated so much that people take it for fact. This is mass manipulation, guys. This is because you don't do the fucking research. You guys, hear something that sounds good or it fits a narrative that you already believe, gives you more evidence to fire off at people, and you believe the shit. Do your fucking research. If you hear something that you are unsure of, go to Google, do the fucking research and find out if there's truth behind it. If you are repeating something that you have never researched, you you are you could be spreading misinformation, you could be You're a sheep. Where where is the research?

20:44Speaker 1:Where's the I want to understand how this is happening. Where's the I'm gonna I'm gonna be factual so that in the event that this is question, I am able to give an answer because real shit. If I would have regurgitated that shit yesterday and did not do the research, and somebody tried to questioned me on it, I'd be like, well, I saw it on YouTube, saw it on TikTok, It's got to be true, right, Like somebody on TikTok said that shit he was wearing a suit had to be factual.

21:08Speaker 1:Come on, guys, back to yesterday's video. I don't like the term ran through. That makes it sound like this this person had a one night's stand or is just out fucking a bunch of dudes. And you know, my wife has two kids from the same person. That's not being ran through. She was in a relationship for a really long time with this person. They were married. Like, that's not the same thing as just meeting a girl on the street that's you know, and finding out later that she's got six kids from four fucking dads. This is a different conversation. The problem is is with what he's saying, there's no context. He's providing the information which is telling the story that supports the narrative that he's trying to tell without the other context there. Because of the Internet, because of social media, because of content creators that speak the things that this man is speaking, we now have a very surface level understanding of things. We don't know if any of it's true because I've heard this over and over again and I haven't done the research to find out if it's real or not. But now that I've heard it so much, it must be true.

22:10Speaker 1:So many people are talking about it, right, like that's the mindset of so many people. I saw something last night on Facebook that said that there was human like DNA found in an asteroid that was two billion years old, and like it looked like a science thing. There was like a link to an article. Well, when I clicked on the link, it took me to a fucking bullshit website. It wasn't actually a science article. So I went to Google and I started searching to find out if there's any truth to any of this, because I do believe that we're star seeds. There's nothing there proving that article to be true. Everything that I read is that it was false, that it was a misnomer. It was something that was created twenty years as a hoax. But it's now making that circulation again, and people are going to read that and go, well, look at that, it's a link to a science thing. It must be true, instead of actually going and reading the data we're doing the research.

22:58Speaker 1:It's the same problem that we're having with the conversation that we're having right now. Guys, if I would have I almost didn't Peaches, and I almost didn't become anything more than a really good time. And that's the honesty of it. Like, there was a whole lot of conversations where I told her flat out in the very beginning when we first started dating, courting that like, I don't know if this is going to go anywhere, because I don't want to raise children again. I was at a point in my life where I was financially free to do whatever I wanted to do. I was semi retired, meaning I still worked when I felt like it. So like I could not work for eight or nine months at a time and be totally okay because of the mailbox money that I was making from my properties and my business, and if I wanted to travel to Tattoo, I could. Like I was at a point where I was able to do whatever the fuck I wanted. If I would have had this type of information shoved down my throat repeatedly, over and over and over again as a single man, that would have never gotten past the dating aspect for her and I, because I wouldn't have

23:59Speaker 1:wanted to, like I would have what about my money, right, because that was super fucking important to me. Money is important to all of us, and anyone who's like money's not important, you're full of shit. You need money to live the life that you want to live, even if that means you were living.

24:13Speaker 3:At the bottom of the barrel.

24:14Speaker 1:You can't have fast food, you can't have real food, you can't have gas in your car, you can't fucking buy clothes. You have to have some sort of financial resources to be able to live any type of way. So you know there was no child support on her part. I you know, she was doing the daycare thing, and she was driving a shitty car. And here I am over here in a great, great off financial situation, and like, what kind of real return on investment am I getting by deciding to be with this woman. I had to put a whole lot of bullshit aside and like really decide that this is what I wanted. And we'll get into that in a little bit, but I want to get to this video.

24:52Speaker 4:It's real deep.

24:53Speaker 2:You should look into the research behind what happens when a woman gets pregnant, even the women who have abortions. By the way, now if the man her baby daddy is not dead, for when she has a connection and relationship with that man pretty much for the rest of her.

25:09Speaker 3:It don't matter if he's in jail either.

25:11Speaker 1:Guys, you think that because somebody's ex is in jail that they don't have something to do with him. That man is still going to be writing letters to the children. There's gonna be collect calls coming in during dinner time or whenever the fuck they feel like calling. There's gonna be a whole lot of things that go into that as well. And when that man gets out, you now have to worry whether or not that man still has her heart. And she's just out running the streets doing what she's doing because she's free while her man is not.

25:35Speaker 1:And that's how I view that shit. Because there are a whole lot of men who are locked up. They get out and get right back with their exes. It destroys homes. That's a whole ass conversation in itself. But just because somebody's locked up doesn't mean that relationship's done.

25:46Speaker 2:For even after the kids are grown, there's still a certain level of need and opportunity that they're going to have to have ongoing communications or events could come up that are going to force them to have to communicate.

25:59Speaker 1:Right, So, and this is not just co parenting. This co parenting will only go so far. Eventually, the kids are going to decide where they want to live. They're going to have a lot more freedom and say, and that person may not be in the life anymore, right Like, they may not speak at all because the kids no longer have a financial responsibility, But you're still going to run into them at events. There's gonna be weddings, there's gonna be grand babies, there's going to be all kinds of things that both parents are going to either attend or someone's going to be the bad guy by not attending.

26:29Speaker 3:And if there is.

26:30Speaker 1:A tumultuous relationship and there is hostilities there, these events are going to be very difficult for everyone involved, especially the new men who is married or dating into this relationship, and it creates a whole lot of problems.

26:44Speaker 2:Why would you want to actively, intentionally and willingly put yourself into a situation where you're basically sharing a woman with another.

26:53Speaker 4:Man at some level you see, you.

26:56Speaker 1:Guys think that's fair. I don't think that I share my wife with her ex husband, just like I don't think she shares me with my ex wife. This is one of those things that I know for a fact, if there were not kids involved, Peaches would never speak to that dude again. Ever, Like there's not a copesthetic situation, there is a whole lot of fucking animosity and hostility, and she is civil because it's the right thing to do. But when the kids are able to make their own decisions and we don't have to have those interactions, she will block him on everything and that will be the end of it. I know that there are people out there who are going to say that's naive, thinking that she won't do that. Why would she? Because I've been here for as long as I've been here, the kids were in diapers, right, So like I have been here for all of this, I know what's going on in that relationship, and there has been a lot of ugly and a lot of hostility, and some of it has made waves in our household, not in our marriage. In our household, there's a difference. But he's right in this aspect.

28:01Speaker 1:Until those kids are of that age. You're not sharing your wife with this person, but this person is going to be there. So when this person creates drama, the great night that you were once having is now full of fucking hostility and there's frustration between both parties and you're trying to find your way back to an even balance. And that comes down to your wife or your girlfriend's inability to set boundaries and follow through. It also speaks to the other person thinking that they're more important than they are because not been boundary set, and they allow these things to continue happening. Ladies, if this is bothering you, please just let me get through this. I promise you.

28:40Speaker 1:This is not me hating on women who have kids.

28:42Speaker 4:A man and women come together, whether it's a marriage or not.

28:45Speaker 2:Okay, whether it literally was a fleeing or a long term relationship that just didn't work out. When they have a child, they are a family. And I don't care what women say. A lot of women will say, oh, wasn't ish, it didn't work out, he didn't want to be in the kid's life.

29:03Speaker 4:A lot to be black and blad.

29:04Speaker 2:They can say whatever they can, They can demean the man however they want they can label the man however they want, but at the end of the day, they're a family at a biological level.

29:11Speaker 3:It just is.

29:12Speaker 2:There's no argument to be had. It really doesn't matter what the family court says. They're a family. So you are joining as the second male or possibly third male if you got more than one baby daddy, You're joining a family that's already been established.

29:29Speaker 1:I disagreed with this really hard when I've listened to this this morning and I have since listened to this a couple more times, and he's not wrong in this either. Biologically, this is a family. You guys may not have, you know, given vows, but you are now connected through DNA with this child. That is a life that is unable of taking care of itself, and the two of them are responsible equally for making sure that this child is capable of surviving until it's an adult. I wanted to make an argument that that's not what family is. Just simply being in links with somebody because of another thing doesn't make family.

30:04Speaker 3:Family is a choice.

30:05Speaker 1:It's the way that we have loyalty and respect towards each other biologically, which is what he said. He's not fucking lying like that's factual.

30:13Speaker 2:And adding yourself as an add on to that, you have to have an incredibly slow sense of self esteem and self worth to do.

30:23Speaker 1:And this is where I start to have problems. I have very high self esteem. I know the worth that I bring to the world. Don't get me wrong, there are still days where I doubt myself. I think we all have those moments where we have imposter syndrome where we feel a certain type of way about what it is that we're doing. But the idea that I am willing to be with my wife, even though she has two kids from a single person before I got to meet her, that that somehow negates my self worth. I know what I have in my wife. I'm not saying that all the women out there who have kids are of the caliber of my wife. I see the videos of you guys on the internet with nine fucking kids talking about how you've got all these different baby daddies and how they ain't shit. The problem is you won't keep your fucking legs closed. And you can blame everyone else for the fact that you keep getting pregnant, but the common denominator and all of your decisions as you my wife does not have those type of decisions. And if I listen to content like this, and I just believed all of that this amazing fucking life that I

31:21Speaker 1:have with my wife would not exist. I have again, I have stated that this is the type of content that is starting to come up in my tiktoks and my YouTube, and it's starting to become to become such a frequent thing that I can see how this is going to create division and it's going to push people away from each other. I already don't care for her ex. I did a lot in the beginning of our relationship to be civil. We did holidays together. I tried to buy them a car like I did a lot trying to make sure that the co parenting situation for the children was as a mutually beneficial in both households as possible.

32:06Speaker 1:On the ROI aspect, I lost a lot of fucking money doing it. Now I have resources that in losing that it didn't affect my livelihood. And if you are a high value man who's got a decent amount of income and good money coming in, I don't understand how taking on this extra small little bill every year, because you think about your yearly income and how much you have to put out for a kid or two. If that's what you're choosing to do. If it breaks you and you are not financially capable of doing that, then there's a bigger discussion that needs to be had. Because you haven't built the empire that you are allowing yourself to believe. You've got a whole lot of ego that needs to be checked.

32:49Speaker 2:Here's why I say that I've been coaching for around five plus years. Okay, but I've been in the game, and I've been around this industry of success and dating relationships for ten years.

32:59Speaker 1:How are you You're going to be talking about success and dating in relationships and not have a ring on your finger. I don't want to hear shit from anybody. That's not where I want to be. If I want to have a successful marriage, I want to hear advice from people who have successful marriages, not from people who have been divorced fifteen times and fucking beats on their person and lies and steals and cheats and thirst traps and fucking does all the things that they're trying to do. So, like, how are you coaching on all of these things and you're not married yourself. Maybe he is and just doesn't wear a ring. I have no idea who this person is.

33:31Speaker 1:Somebody else reacted to this video and I had to go find it.

33:35Speaker 2:I have often we do journals, so like, for example, in my program, when I bring a new student in, I give them a journal, three journals.

33:42Speaker 4:My ideal self and value is.

33:43Speaker 2:A man, my ideal woman, my ideal lifestyle in relation to your romantic life. I have never once seen a man write out the journal my ideal woman and have any description in that journal that yeah, I'm looking for a woman who's already had children by another man.

34:04Speaker 4:I've never seen it.

34:05Speaker 2:So whenever I see a man who's choosing today to single mother, I know for a fact he's making that decision out of a scarcity of options.

34:19Speaker 1:I'm gonna say this and I'm not. I don't think that. I'm like I think on average like a five or six when it comes to my number. But I'm a tattoo artist. I have I haven't had good financial success in my life. I own my own house, I own my own cars, I had multiple properties when it came to real estate. When before Hurricanean I had I could have had a whole lot of options. It would have been very easy for me to as a tattoo artist to find a whole lot of women, So it's not a scarcity thing. At some point in your life, you have to determine if the person that you're talking to is going to be compatible with you, and ultimately that's going to matter more than their body count. It's going to matter more than their past decisions, and that is going to speak on your security. This whole you know, scarcity mindset and you know, lack of self worth and your insecure and all this shit that he's been talking about.

35:14Speaker 1:I think the opposite is more accurate. If you are too insecure to dat a woman who has kids, if you are so insecure that you're worried about her BodyCount because you're afraid that there's other men out there that could fuck better than you, then maybe you need to step your game up. Bring some toys into the bedroom, watch some how to videos like buy buy some books. There's some things that you could do to step your game up, be a little more enthusiastic in the bed, focus on her, not on you. Right, Like, there's a whole lot of things that you could be doing that an aspect, and that would fix your insecurities. I'm not worried about a BodyCount, and she's got a little BodyCount anyways.

35:47Speaker 3:But I'm not. That's not something that I've ever worried about.

35:49Speaker 1:I mean, when I was like a teenager, I'm worried about that shit, because that's little boys worry about that kind of shit. I'm not worried about her kids in the aspect of the fact that she has kids, or the DNA thing that he was talking about, or any of that shit. I was worried about giving up my retirement age. I'm in my prime years, as he said, I was getting ready to start traveling the world and doing all the shit that I want to do. And taking on two new kids meant that I had sixteen and seventeen years of my life that I now had to give up to do the things because she had children.

36:20Speaker 1:I could have given that up. I could have just been like, look, this isn't what I want. I want to travel and do this thing, and I would have missed out on all of the love and the compassion and the joy that I have in my marriage.

36:30Speaker 3:You guys understand where I'm getting.

36:31Speaker 1:Out with this shit like you can't listen to somebody on the internet tell you about your relationship.

36:36Speaker 3:Even us.

36:37Speaker 1:We've told you guys over and over and over again that we get a pinprick of a view. You guys, look through the fucking doorhole to see what's going on in your hallway.

36:45Speaker 3:You have a very limited view. That's what we get.

36:49Speaker 1:So when we give you, guys information on the podcast, we're only giving you information about what you sent us. We have no fucking idea what's going on in your life. These people that speak in broad generalities and try to tell you things, they wrap up their message inside of language that makes it so that you can't argue it. He's right that there is no ROI for a man that is deciding to raise two children that is not his. That is factual. There's nothing that anyone can say or do that's going to prove that.

37:18Speaker 3:Differently.

37:19Speaker 1:You were going to invest money into two or three or five, or however in many other human beings, and you are not going to get anything from that, and maybe not even gratitude. That's fucking factual. The language is what makes that factual. The family conversation, I wanted to argue that point, he said the word biologically, it removes your ability to make an argument against that stance. So for people who are listening, whether they're mentally receptive enough to understand what he's saying, subconsciously, their brain is picking up what he's putting down and they're developing ideas based around it. You hear ROI, you think it's not worth it, I hear ROI, I think risk assessment. I have to determine if the investment that I'm making right now is going to be worth it long run, if I can afford to lose this money. That's what happens when you go on vacation. You're buying time and memories and things of that nature. If I love my wife and want to be able to vacation with her, and I have to take these two kids along, and the kids are good and behaved kids because I'm help raising them, I'm

38:23Speaker 1:just helping that along the line. So like, is there an ROI to be had there? It's a lot.

38:32Speaker 2:And what they'll do is they'll always rationalize it and justify it and try to make it seem like they're doing something honorable, Like they found a woman who really was a good woman, but she was with a bad guy and he didn't treat her right, or he left, and he's stepping in the equation with his cape flapping in the wind, and he's going to save the day and be the man the night in shining Army.

38:52Speaker 1:I didn't want any of that. I didn't want to be the night and shining Armor. I didn't want anything to do with any of this. When we first started dating and decided that we were going to try to make a run at this, knowing she had kids, I told her I wasn't going to discipline. I wasn't going to get involved in any of this shit. Like they're her kids. If there's something going on and I have a problem, I'm gonna talk to her and she's gonna deal with it. I had a very different understanding of who her ex was at that time. I thought he was very present in the kids' lives and doing the dad thing, and like there was a whole lot of a different narrative that was being had in that moment.

39:22Speaker 1:None of this for me was stepping in and playing superhero. I know the relationship that she had with him. He was abusive as fuck and manipulative, and there was a whole lot of things that went on there. And this isn't hypothetical or her bashing him. This is what I've seen with my own eyes in the beginning. I didn't see that. In the beginning. I saw a woman that I wanted to be with that happened to have two fucking kids. And yes, that was a major inconvenience for me at the time. I've grown to love those kids as if they're my own. There's a he's talking about it being an honorable thing. It is an honorable thing.

39:57Speaker 1:We need more mentors. This guy makes his money coaching men who don't have fathers in their lives to teach them how to be men. So if there were more men out there being mentors, raising children and being present in their children's lives, he'd be out of a fucking job, so would we, right, So, Like, the difference is is we're doing free podcast shit. We're trying to fucking create environments where people succeed. It's not about taking money from you guys. Don't get me wrong. This is a business and we need to make money to continue doing it.

40:30Speaker 1:We do our podcasts for free. We don't run advertisers on our show. We do have ads that pop up on Spotify and shit, but we don't see none of that money we get paid for our downloads.

40:45Speaker 2:Farmer who she should have ended up with the first time. It sounds good, it makes you feel better about your decision.

40:52Speaker 1:It don't make me feel at all. Justify it don't make me feel good at all. Why would it make me feel good knowing that these kids are as strange with their dad, or that there's children out there who's fought treated their mother as a cum dumpster and just fucking went along with their life and that's the end of that shit. They're they're no longer present in the child's life. Why would that make me feel good? Knowing that I'm stepping up and creating change to be with their mother? Is not about being a superhero. Just this kind of talk aggravates the fuck out of me. And I can understand why this narrative is so popular because of the amount of hurt that's out there and the way that men view this. You hear enough of this as a single young man, and I can one hundred percent understand why men are removing themselves from the dating pool.

41:36Speaker 1:They're saying that more than sixty percent of men under the age of thirty have just given up. They're not even fucking trying anymore. And the ones who are trying are going to run into women who have been with multiple partners, who have had kids, who have been divorced. Because the dating pool has become that green sludge on the bottom of a pool that ain't been clean in five years.

41:59Speaker 2:Frames hurt and picture in which she does it, she seems more like a victim than the culprit of poor decision.

42:06Speaker 1:No, my wife being a victim. My wife made a lot of bad decisions in her younger years, and even with her bad decisions, she doesn't regret her children right, like, would she have done things differently if she had different knowledge growing up in the situation she was in? Absolutely I believe that. But she's not a victim. She made choices, she's accepted those choices, and she's living a dope fucking life now. And real shit, she'd have been doing this with or without me. I may have been able to give her a leg up in the world because of where I was when we met, but she was already doing the things. She was already managing businesses in her mid twenties, and like she was on her way to becoming a tattoo artist. That could you know, because of her her bubbly personality and her ability, could have been pulling six figures a year. She would she was on her way to doing her damn things. She'd have been successful with her without me.

42:57Speaker 2:But make no mistake about it, both the man and the woman are to be blamed.

43:03Speaker 4:Any time you have a broken house.

43:05Speaker 2:I agree it is very very rare that one person is at fault for the failure of a relationship, especially when a child was involved.

43:14Speaker 1:See so now he's coming back to the vernacular, the articulation of his point in a way that cannot be argued.

43:21Speaker 4:How could you be more motivated to stay in a situation?

43:24Speaker 3:Guys?

43:24Speaker 1:This is how you get manipulated. This is how manipulation happens. People wrap up. It's like a pig in a blanket. The thing that they want you to believe is the pig. The blanket is the truth that's wrapped around. It's like giving a dog a medicine and a thing of cheese or one of those little fucking pocket treats.

43:40Speaker 4:With somebody and work through things.

43:43Speaker 2:When there's a child involved, Like, what greater motivation could there possibly be, Like you would have to be to the point where you don't even care.

43:50Speaker 4:About the child's well being.

43:52Speaker 1:So here we go now, now I don't I gotta be honest. I stopped before we got to this point. So anything beyond this, I don't know what he's gonna say. This is one of those situations where if there's actually abuse happening, physical manipulation, whatever the case may be, psychological abuse happening, and a child is growing up in the home, that child's going to get it too.

44:10Speaker 3:It doesn't just stop with the mom.

44:12Speaker 1:So are you saying that women who are in physically, spiritually, emotionally abusive situation shouldn't fucking get out, that they should stay for the sake of the child, because that child's going to get abused because of it.

44:23Speaker 3:I did if.

44:26Speaker 2:Not being able to get along with this person was sincerely enough motivation for you to just ditch the family household and force the child to be bouncing back and forth between two households and then having the fighting and the lack of cooperation that typically happens. I mean, you're really dealing with two dysfunctional people. More than likely write anytime that you see a broken household, and you know minuners of blame too.

44:51Speaker 4:But we're talking about.

44:52Speaker 3:Now truth again.

44:55Speaker 2:What I would encourage men to do if you find yourself dating a single mother is you need.

45:01Speaker 4:To learn the game. A lot of men who end up dating.

45:04Speaker 2:Single mamas will often repeat this trope, well, where are all.

45:08Speaker 4:The women who are over the age of twenty five that don't have kids?

45:11Speaker 2:Well, where are all the women that are single that have their stuff together, that are still looking to date?

45:17Speaker 4:You just don't get out and meet enough women. That's all that.

45:20Speaker 2:That means, you don't go out and proactively take control of your dating relationship and romantic life, and you don't meet any women. You're going on the dating apps, you're going into places where it's easy.

45:32Speaker 4:And let me explain what I mean by easy.

45:33Speaker 1:Right, If you're a high value person, I hate that fucking term so much, that's a way for you to mentally masturbate guys. But if you're a high value person and you think that you're some hot shit and you are struggling to meet people because you're afraid to go out and approach somebody, and you're only rely on dating apps, or you're too busy, or whatever the case may be. Maybe you're not high value, maybe you're just busy. Maybe you are finding reasons to just begintting through your life instead of actually trying to enjoy yourself. This goes to the self confidence thing that he was talking about earlier.

46:08Speaker 1:If you are a high value person and you've got your shit together and you fucking know it, you're gonna conduct yourself differently when you talk to a woman. There's not gonna be this fucking weird like blowing up their phone, chasing them, playing the fucking games and doing all of that shit, because you know what you bring to the table. And like, this was the situation with her and I there was. I tested the fuck out of her. I had a lot to lose in our relationship if this didn't work out, Like and I'm not proud of it, but I gotta be honest, I wouldn't have done it any differently, knowing what I know now. Do I feel guilty or like wrong that I tested her the way that I did? Sure, But she passed all those tests and I got this sense of safety and security that I needed to move forward with a woman who had two kids and we've built this fucking life together. If back to what I was saying, if you are somebody that thinks you're high value, and you think that you are some hot shit and you bring something to the world, your confidence is going to say a whole lot, and you're not gonna be needy just looking for the easy

47:07Speaker 1:way out, because you're going to be used to rejection. And I mean that in terms of business, you're gonna be used to failing. You're gonna be used to learning lessons. There's gonna be a different charisma about you and the way that you carry yourself because you know what you're capable of. And that's where the whole thing with Tupac said, if you got to tease me because I don't want it, if it's that easy, like that's the truth of it. Like at that point we look at you, guys, very differently than when you conduct yourself as a person of value. Men, men who are used to a competitive environment. When things come too easy to us, it's fucking boring, Like there's no excitement to be had there. Where's the chase, where's the negotiations, where's the thrill of.

47:50Speaker 3:Closing?

47:51Speaker 1:The deal for a lack of a better term, Like, there's a lot that goes into that. Psychologically, there's a lot of like wanting to win that goes into that. And that's a very different conversation that I really don't want to get into because some of that's toxic as fuck as well. But like, to his point, if they're only looking for easy, is this really the market that you're talking to, Like he's talking about having high value men and like your ROI and your biological family, and he's using all these terms that indicate that he's dealing with men who are who are fucking earners and closers and like salesman's and shit. So like, if that's the case, why are they having a hard time talking to women unless they're easy? This is the verbiage guys, Like the people that are going to be listening to this video because they're going to be relating to him, and they're hurt and they're living their life through a hurt lens because they've probably been rejected even by women who have kids, and now well you know they're easy, and now they're changing the narrative in their mind and it's creating division A.

48:49Speaker 4:Lot of men.

48:50Speaker 2:If you're ending up with a dating pool of options that are like single moms and just women who don't have their stuff together, what that means is that you're not taking enough action to get the result that you want in your dady life. So you're ending up with women who are in desperate situations. And make no mistake about it, a single mother is in a desperate situation. She already knows that by being a single mother, her value is lower in the majority.

49:16Speaker 4:Like damn near all men's eyes.

49:19Speaker 1:He's not wrong in this. I know y'all don't want to hear that shit. I know you don't want to hear it. But when men are thinking about starting a family, they're not thinking of starting a family with somebody who already has a family. We have the idea in our head that we're going to meet the girl and it's going to be the perfect relationship, and one day they're going to have our kids and we're going to have the perfect family and the white picket fence and all that shit. Men dream about that shit. It may not be to the same level that women do with the marriage and all of that, but we do have an expectation of what these things are going to be so again, he's now wrapped up his opinion in this nonsense inside of some truth nuggets. We have two and a half minutes left to this someone to let it play.

49:58Speaker 2:She's already been knocked up by an other man. She already has the baggage from the relationship. Like I already said, she's already been You know that body count's already probably high.

50:06Speaker 4:If she's a single mom.

50:07Speaker 2:Now, a woman in that position, what she's gonna be willing to do that other women are not gonna be willing to do.

50:13Speaker 3:I lied, I have to. He brought the fucking body count thing. I know.

50:18Speaker 1:I know that there are men out there who absolutely do not want to have a woman who's been with more than like ten people. If if men, if you want women to have low body counts, you need to stop runn around trying to stick your dick and everything that breathes. That's just all there is to that shit. They have the body count they do because of the other half of the equation. Ladies, you are not going to lock a man down because you open your legs. There needs to be time. You guys need to learn each other. There's a whole lot of things that need to be established before you run around and start fucking because now you're gonna have a kid with somebody you don't know, or you're gonna get pregnant and have to abort it if that's what you're gonna do, And that leads into a whole other different discussion, right, and like is this really what you want? Do you want to be response for another man? Uh, you know, another man's child for the rest of your life as a woman, Like you are going to raise this kid on your own and and it's very likely that that's going to be the case when you look at single single mother

51:11Speaker 1:households versus single father households. They're saying that studies say that after two years, most men aren't present in their children's lives at all. They start making excuses, they're not coming over anymore. There's a whole lot of things that just doesn't fucking happen anymore. So, like, what what's what's that look.

51:24Speaker 3:Like for you?

51:25Speaker 1:Do you do you think that because you got somebody got you knocked up, that you're gonna have this baby and that's gonna somehow fix the relationship problems. And they're never going to leave you because there's a kid there. Now, do you know anybody that that's actually the case. It's just not this body count thing. Maybe this is a me thing. Maybe maybe it might just be me. I don't give a fuck unless you're like Bonnie Blue, that's fucking a thousand dudes in a day, or you know it's ridiculously high. That shit doesn't phaze me. I'm I'm not gonna say that. I was gonna say something really inappropriate sexual. I'm gonna just move past that. Maybe there's a whole lot of confidence in me behind closed doors that I don't have to worry about that kind of shit.

52:09Speaker 3:I'm move on.

52:12Speaker 1:Actually, you know what, I'm done with this because I'm starting to get annoyed. Guys, thank you for hanging out. The reaction stuff is something that we do a lot for Patreon. If you guys are interested in more content like that, I highly recommend you go check out our Patreon, Patreon, dot com, forward slash to be better, got to do a pass community over there.

52:26Speaker 3:Everything that we do is live.

52:28Speaker 1:I recorded this in front of thirty forty people throughout the entire thing, and that's pretty nice for a Saturday. It's been a nice little chat. We're doing a thing. With that being said, guys, remember you're the author of your own life, so grab a pen and we will fucking see you next time.