Episode notes
On this episode, Heather is back from her unreal show at the Ryman Auditorium in Nashville. She chats about the afterparty on Broadway where she was pouring lemondrop shots for the girls where she is brought back to her days behind the sticks. After having a conspiracy dinner in the Turks, she came home to binge watch multiple documentaries. She takes voicemails from people with a workplace crush, a weird request from an uber driver, and someone looking for alternative experiences in their relationship. Episode Sponsors:Refresh your spring wardrobe with Quince. Go to Quince.com/absolutely…
Podcast
Absolutely Not
"Absolutely not" to legitimately everything.....Comedian Heather McMahan creates a safe-space for us to tell-all and bitch about the rest. No topics are off-limits as we break down the everyday struggles of doing the most, and the least, at the same damn time. Come for the humor, authentic discussio
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E382 · 20 May 2026 · 50 min
F*ck Yo Couch
On this episode, Heather is coming to you from the new NYC Dear Media studios. Fresh off the heels of Netflix is a Joke, she has some explaining to do about her show in LA. She got to see friends and foes alike! We get voicemails from women buying $20 panties and girlies having a cruise reunion at the special taping. Episode Sponsors:Head to https://www.squarespace.com/absolutely to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code absolutely.For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners $10 off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when you visit…
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E381 · 13 May 2026 · 1 hr 11 min
Ole Miss Divas with Jay Jurden
On this episode Heather brings hilarious comedian and friend Jay Jurden to the pod. Jay and Heather go all the way back to the undergrad theatre department at Ole Miss. They reminisce about their hate for Lane Kiffin, being a theatre major together and how their paths lead them to Netflix is a Joke festival. You can catch Jay’s latest special, Yes Ma’am, on Hulu. Episode Sponsors:Refresh your everyday with luxury you'll actually use. Head to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too. Join the membership for where you live at…
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E380 · 8 May 2026 · 1 hr 9 min
Replay: Life's a Sprint
On this replay episode, Heather tells us what really happened at Netflix is a Joke in 2024. She gives a full recap of her time in Golden state and spills the tea from the comedy shows, after parties and more! She opens up about how her life has felt like a sprint and she just made it through the finish line, yet feels hungry for more. She also answers some of the best Absolutely Not's and Yes's we've had to date!Episode Sponsors:Shop at Sephora or get 10% off your first purchase at k18hair.com with code HEATHER.Sign up now and Acorns will boost your new account with a $5 bonus investment.…
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E379 · 6 May 2026 · 1 hr 2 min
Mean but True with Suzanne Lambert
On this episode, Heather welcomes Suzanne Lambert to the podcast to chat about all things growing up in Georgia, the drama of politics and spray tans. The commiserate about sorority life, hotties in the senate, and Connecticut Karen’s. Episode Sponsors:Head to https://www.squarespace.com/absolutely to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code absolutely.For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners $10 off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when you visit Nutrafol.com and enter promo code ABSOLUTELYNOT.You don’t have to be on this journey…
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E378 · 29 Apr 2026 · 1 hr 16 min
We’ll Cry In June
On this episode, Heather is in full overstimulation mode as she juggles work chaos, no WiFi, and a rogue bird. She explains why “we’ll cry in June” has become her current life motto and is ready to launch a full investigation into the missing scientists. She then gets to your calls about birth conspiracies, offline shopping problems, and frat formals.Episode Sponsors:Head to Biologica.com/ABSOLUTELY to take their Quick Hormonal Life Stage Quiz to find the formula that’s right for you. And right now, subscribers can receive up to 32% off their purchase. Get 15% off Branch Basics with the code…
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E376 · 15 Apr 2026 · 1 hr 1 min
Trying Consistency
On this episode, Heather is down in the basement and going through a lot right now. Her fat kneecap is fat, but a visit to the Dr.’s office leads to hearing a missing puzzle piece about her Dad. She also chats about the Buff City Soap mafia coming for her. We hear voicemails from one of our Love on the Spectrum favorites, a mom debating about using her kid on TikTok and a royal family hater.Episode Sponsors:Save 20% Off Honeylove by going to honeylove.com/ABSOLUTELY! #honeylovepodHead to livemomentous.com, and use promo code absolutely for up to 35% off your first orderVisit…
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E375 · 10 Apr 2026 · 53 min
Replay: Master Scammers Part 2 with Raymond Padilla
In honor of Masters Week, we are replaying a 2023 episode where we join Heather as she sits down with the ultimate scammer, Raymond. We discuss how they scammed their way into the Masters tournament, yet again. It is an in-depth observation into the golf world that rarely few people get to see. They get into just how much merch they bought, how swollen their feet were and how many azaleas they really drank!Episode Sponsors:Yasso awarded as product coupons. No purch necessary. Open to 50 US/DC, 18+. Ends 11:59pm ET 4/30. Rules: Yasso.com/ABSOLUTELY Right now, Merit Beauty is offering our…
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E374 · 8 Apr 2026 · 1 hr 3 min
Big Bold Bitches with Becky Robinson
On this episode, Heather welcomes Becky Robinson back to the podcast studio after breaking the hard news that Becky cannot join us on the Absolutely Knot Cruise 2.0. They chat about the happy memories from the cruise. Becky lets us know how she lets loose when she comes home from the road. Episode Sponsors:When life feels overwhelming, therapy can help. Sign up and get 10% off at BetterHelp.com/absolutely.Refresh your spring wardrobe with Quince. Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too. Head to squarespace.com/absolutely for a free…
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E373 · 1 Apr 2026 · 1 hr 16 min
Spring Break Guardian Angels
On this episode, Heather is at the LA studio and welcoming her first live callers! These hussies really bring some wild spring break Absolutely Not’s to Heather and we are forever changed! We have callers that were down at the Villages, on a hetero bachelor party in Baltimore, wheelin’ and dealin’ in Daytona as a newly crowned amateur stripper, a near miss on girls gone wild Gen Xer and someone who voluntarily went on a Greyhound for over 24 hours.Episode Sponsors:Join the loyalty program for renters at joinbilt.com/absolutely. Make sure to use our URL so they know we sent you.Save 20% Off…
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E372 · 27 Mar 2026 · 1 hr
Bonus: Arigato Gozaimasu with Jeff Daniels
On this episode, Heather welcomes Jeff to the studio to discuss all things Japan! They go through their wagyu dinner reservations, baseball with Ohtani, treats from 7-11 and overall Japanese culture. They give you everything you need to know before heading over to Japan for the first time. Episode Sponsors:Find Kahlúa Dunkin Caramel Swirl at retailers nationwide, including Walmart, Total Wine, Albertsons, Kroger, Ralphs, Safeway, BevMo, Publix, and more. Must be 21 or older to purchase. Please drink responsibly. For additional information, visit Kahlua.com and follow @Kahlua on…
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