Help! My kid only eats beige food or vegemite on toast

0:00Speaker 1:This podcast was recorded on the lands of the boon Warong people of the Kulin nation, the land on which we're lucky enough to raise our sons and daughters, always was, and always will be Aboriginal Land. Hello, and welcome to Dear Ready or Not, the show where we answer three of your questions on making work work alongside motherhood.

0:17Speaker 2:I'm Lou and I'm boots law on that one.

0:21Speaker 3:And today you are asking us all about fussy.

0:23Speaker 1:Eats and what to do when your child will only eat beige food.

0:27Speaker 2:We know that one.

0:28Speaker 3:We do know that one.

0:29Speaker 1:What to do if you're a working mum who doesn't have a village and if you should have a third child in your forties.

0:35Speaker 2:Ooh, I love those questions.

0:38Speaker 1:And as timing would have it, we want to give a big thanks to our friends at Veggimite who have kindly sponsored Ready or Not and this segment. And we know how stressful breakfast and meal times in general can be with kids. We are with you, which is why we loved this question. So we wanted to offer you some dear reassurances, some realistic tips and things we've found helpful with our kids. That isn't about creating the perfect breakfast every morning. It is about finding manageable options for your kids that they'll actually eat so that you're not staying the day on an empty stomach.

1:07Speaker 2:I love Vegimi.

1:09Speaker 4:I'm talking about Vegimi, and I'm happy to be here talking about fussy eating because I know a thing or do about that. So shall we get into the first question? Yes, and I normally ask that so I love you like sweetie. Just ask the question and I will first question from our wonderful listener, Kelly, I'd love to know your thoughts on being a working mum and not having a village. We live hours from family and I'm the main breadwinner for our family, so when our second child was born, my husband elected to stay home and care for our two girls two days a week and run the house for the rest of the time. The repercussions of this has meant family judge, people think he does nothing, and it results in my feeling of guilt for needing him to be home so I can focus on my business and bringing in enough for our family help.

1:52Speaker 2:That's so tough. Yeah, I'm sorry to hear that first time.

1:56Speaker 3:I'm sorry to hear that. It is really difficult.

1:59Speaker 1:Personally, I do you think having a village makes or breaks your motherhood experience? So it doesn't always have to be family or friends. It can be new acquaintances that you meet through your school. It can be people that you bump into on your morning walk. It could be somebody that you meet the dog park. There's a lot of focus on your village being your family or people that you've known for a long amount of time. But in my own experience, some of the people that I've got now in my village of friends that I've made at the start of the year.

2:27Speaker 4:Yeah, there's also a lot of pressure on it being like from that mother's group, and if you missed that window, then you're sort of like done. When you've returned to work, you have less time and it all feels really hard to build.

2:36Speaker 1:Yes, my biggest suggestions on how to create that if that's something that you are looking for, is through sports, through extracurricular activities for yourself, whether it's cooking, baking, tennis, whatever that might look like. That you're interested in getting outside in the community, So if you have a dog, go for a walk for somebody on your walk. If your children are at school, start the conversation with a parent in the school yard. If your child wants to do activity, start the conversation at basketball on the weekends.

3:06Speaker 3:The main thing is talk.

3:08Speaker 2:Yes, the hard thing is too.

3:09Speaker 4:If you don't have a village and you're feeling this judgment which you've described, there might be a sense that you want to like almost retreat from the world, and you do feel a bit lonely, but there's really no way to get out of that unless you get out there. I think joining a tennis lesson is a great idea.

3:25Speaker 1:Also, everyone's families look different. I always find it's so odd that people feel the need to make remarks on your partner when as a society we're all suggesting that men take on more kids and God forbids they actually do. Yeah, And then it's like she's feeling guilty for that as well.

3:44Speaker 3:Her family's making her feel guilty about it. Drop the guilt.

3:48Speaker 1:Whatever relationship and partnership you've got, and whatever your circumstances are, they're obviously working.

3:54Speaker 2:For they're the right ones for your family.

3:56Speaker 1:Yeah, I think it's incredible that your partner gets to spend that time hands on with your kids.

4:02Speaker 2:Think about the path that you're setting with that.

4:04Speaker 4:Yeah, that is magical, it is avaliable, and not many dads are doing that.

4:08Speaker 2:Yeah.

4:08Speaker 1:And if your partner is in a situation where perhaps he needs a village that we have heard things where oh it's a bit strange that there's dads at the park and not months, I would encourage him to break that mold and start the conversation head on, yes and own it and say I'm a stay at home dad. My partner is in a high en job and works full time, so I've taken on the care giving responsibilities. I cannot imagine any mum in that moment is going to turn around and say something horrible.

4:34Speaker 4:Love, I would be like, I want to learn from how this happened, what's your dynamic, how you making it work?

4:40Speaker 1:I would love to that exactly. Maybe approach it with honesty and just pointed out for what it is. But I'm sorry that you're going through that. Villages can be hard to build. They do take time and effort, and you also need to accept them for what they are. You do not have to be best friends with everybody or share the same opinions as everybody in your village. But the reason we have villages is for help, yes, and sometimes we need to strip it back and take it.

5:03Speaker 2:For what it is.

5:05Speaker 4:Thanks again to Veggimie for sponsoring Ready or Not and our dear Reassurances segment and for helping take a little bit of the stress and guilt out of those busy family mornings. If your kids like the original Vegimite, great, but if you're looking for something more mild, definitely check out Vegimite Kids.

5:21Speaker 2:Question two high lows on loo. Is anyone else's kid living entirely on beige food?

5:27Speaker 4:My three year old has decided toast, crackers, and pasta are basically the only things she'll eat.

5:32Speaker 2:I feel guilty at every single meal. Help. Oh gosh, we know.

5:37Speaker 3:This one well, We know this one well.

5:38Speaker 4:It seems quite ironic that we have this listener question asking us what we do about our kids eating only beige food. Because I have the crust of a vegimite sandwich. Ray won't touch any inch of this that doesn't have the Vegimite kids spread on it, and I'm okay with it.

5:51Speaker 1:Can I just say there is nothing wrong with vegimite and butter on toast.

5:57Speaker 4:Oh, it's the go to in our family, if anyone's sick and it was for me go up to it would always be like if you don't feel well and you don't feel like eating anything else, that was always like a warm hug of a meal.

6:06Speaker 2:Yeah.

6:07Speaker 1:I think often what happens is that parents feel this pressure to make for breakfast, for instance, like overnight oats, chea puddings, these like beautiful, delicate flowered meals. Sometimes you're a kid, just what's vegimon on toast? Yes, and that's fine. So I have three kids. One is older, she'll eat the chea puddings, she'll lead all the overnight oats. My other two will only eat Vegimie Kids on toast, And I'm fine with that because, in conjunction with milk and apples and bananas, it does make for what I consider to be quite a nutritionally balanced breakfast.

6:41Speaker 3:Yes, it's okay.

6:43Speaker 2:We also, like I always just try and find a really good quality bread that has a bit more health in it, bit more nutrition.

6:49Speaker 1:Well, you don't need to lose because Vegimite Kids has the same amount of vitamins B one, B two, B three, and B nine as original vegimi. The newest veggimi, I might say, and these vitamins are important for brain and nervous system function, energy release, and reducing fatigue. I did look this up because I did think to myself, what would I do if I was worried about what my children were eating, if they were only eating toast with veggie Yeah, I would return back to that start and think to myself, I'm doing right knowing that I can rely on veggimite kids on toast with a glass of milk and a piece of fruit. Chef's kiss. That's all I need in the mornings. We don't need to overcomplicate it.

7:25Speaker 4:I also need to tell you about what I make at home. When veggiemite came to us, I was like, well, I love you so much already, so this is going to work really well for you and I vegem I make cheesey mite scrolls.

7:36Speaker 2:I don't even use pastry because I'm like, if I buy wraps, I can use them for multi purse.

7:41Speaker 4:I can make the kids honey wraps, I can make the kids veggiemite wraps. I can make whatever. So I just buy wraps from the supermarket. I saw, what are we talking, Mountain, They're like those the ones I'm buying all like high protein something wraps. I don't even know what they are I like it, to be honest with you, but they're great and they're tasty, and they're not too thick, not too thin.

7:59Speaker 2:I think that's key. You want something in the middle.

8:02Speaker 4:So I saute a grated carrot and a grated zucchini in the pan with lots of butter, yep, and then I add that to a mixing bowl. And then I put a big spoon of vegemite kids into that mixing bowl, so it's buttery. It's got their sauteed carrots and zucchini, and then the Vegiemites add it. Then I lay out my wraps. I put a layer of that on. Then I add grated cheese, roll them up, bit of butter on top of them too, just to make sure they're all lovely and moist, and then I just put them in the oven for about twelve minutes. My kids eat them like they just avow them. And it's the only time my kids eat zucchini and carrot. Well, Ray actually is here and he loves them. Ray, do you have anything to say about cheesey mite scrolls? He's just got one in his hand, said no, but he's actually.

8:46Speaker 3:Got one in his hand that actually.

8:48Speaker 4:Couldn't be better. He's actually really annoyed that we've thrown to him. But it's the only way I've been able to get them to eat zucchini and carrot. It feels like a massive win.

8:56Speaker 1:I also think for breakfast, keep it simple, and I'm going to say the same thing dinner, So toasts with vegimi kids eggs on toast is a good one. Sometimes I do vegimie kids with avocado. Yes, also really easy and you know, just beefs it up a bit.

9:10Speaker 2:Yeah, and it makes it more salty and delicious.

9:13Speaker 3:Yeap, exactly right. English muffins we.

9:15Speaker 4:Also be a lot the whole meal English muffins the my favorite.

9:19Speaker 3:We call the burgers.

9:21Speaker 4:I love that we have with our poached eggs hates and I always have vegemi underneath them, and the kids love that too.

9:27Speaker 2:Makes it more exciting for them.

9:28Speaker 3:Dotimes.

9:28Speaker 4:We have that for dinner because we can't be bothered. And if I add an apple or banana to that meal, or some blueberries, I'm.

9:34Speaker 2:Like, that's a well balanced meal.

9:37Speaker 4:You don't want this anymore because you ate all the vegimite out of it, and he doesn't.

9:40Speaker 2:Want it anymore.

9:41Speaker 4:I mean, I think this just goes to show how much vegimie kids we go through in our household.

9:46Speaker 2:And I've been given the scraps cheers Ray.

9:48Speaker 4:So coming back to that listener question about feeling okay with a Beije diet, I just think it's so reassuring to know that one meal doesn't represent the whole week. Yes, so embrace what they like, and if that's vegimi toast, think great, and then add in little bits and pieces that they do like. It might be bananas, it might be a glass of milk, it might be some blueberries, it might be some apples. Getting veggies into kids can be notoriously hard. But if you're getting little bits of fruit, a little bit of milk for protein, a bit of fiber from the toast, and the bee vitamins from VEGGIEMI you're doing better.

10:20Speaker 2:You're doing a good job.

10:21Speaker 4:Yes, don't be so hard on yourself. Question three, Question three for me from Beck.

10:27Speaker 1:I love a quick one, Beck, because I know the answer was I am so torn about having a third my first two or fifteen months apart. So it's been in intense three years, but now that my youngest is nearly.

10:37Speaker 3:Two, things have almost been too cruisy.

10:41Speaker 2:Oh my god, this is your girls.

10:42Speaker 3:A type of girl love chaos.

10:44Speaker 1:My partner and I have flexible work, and I had a complete identity crisis since having kids and stepped away from my former industry. I'm now studying part time and still do some part time work, but I'm basically a proud stay at home mum.

10:55Speaker 2:Go you so you should be.

10:57Speaker 1:Yes, we can afford it, we have the capacity for it, but I'm scared of upsetting status quo. A friend told me three kids is a young person's game. I'm turning forty this year and we still have embryos from IVF. Give me the no bullshit blow by blow insight into the jump from two to three.

11:11Speaker 2:Go girl, go Jillette. It's like I actually wrote this question.

11:17Speaker 1:I lovesh, I love it. I think for me and from the three child mums that I've spoken to, I'm yet to meet someone that hasn't felt this.

11:28Speaker 3:I feel like the jump from either zero to one can be hard, or one to two can be hard.

11:32Speaker 1:But two to three just I don't know if it's the children that are thirdborns, but they just slot in and you really come into your own in motherhood.

11:41Speaker 2:I've got a friend who is the best. Wow. No, my friend's like, it really brought the chaots.

11:46Speaker 3:Oh, it's definitely chaotic. I'm not gonna lie.

11:48Speaker 2:I can't believe how much more chaotic?

11:50Speaker 3:Yeah, I can't believe.

11:51Speaker 4:But to be fair, that's your only mum of three friend of mine that has had that spin.

11:56Speaker 1:Oh no, no, like it's definitely harder, Like the drop offs are harder.

11:59Speaker 3:Get think is in their seats.

12:01Speaker 2:I was like, we just can't you agree this whole episode. So I thought, no, it's true.

12:04Speaker 3:It is.

12:06Speaker 1:There's way more mess and there's a shit ton more washing. I have found that astronomical. I'm like, whoa, I have a lot of Yes, it is challenging, but it is so thrilling. It is so humbling, and it makes you for me personally, I am a quintessential overachiever. I love cleanliness and order, and it has really put my entire existence in perspective. You can't necessarily have those things with three children, and you end up becoming this I think. I mean, you can correct me if I'm wrong, But I think you become this more relaxed, fun, go with a flow person that perhaps you've always dreamt of being.

12:49Speaker 2:An't you think was the reason that you were like that?

12:52Speaker 3:No, I think that's what's happened to me.

12:54Speaker 2:But you had a third child.

12:56Speaker 1:I genuinely think it has been a pushing force in me becoming more at peace.

13:03Speaker 2:Interesting. Well, that's because I think you wanted a third so much.

13:05Speaker 4:Yeah, But also I think that also comes with the kids ages, Like I become more relax mum every year.

13:10Speaker 2:You know.

13:11Speaker 1:Maybe I think they'll be challenges though that we haven't yet come across when the kids are older. But I do think there is a massive difference between people that have two children and people that have three children.

13:21Speaker 2:Like I hate to say it, difference between the people.

13:23Speaker 3:No, No, I think there's a difference in parenting.

13:26Speaker 2:Cheers. I couldn't get much more lax. What the would be like, we'll clean that.

13:32Speaker 3:You just run out of time. And I mean, if you're on the fence and you're.

13:37Speaker 4:Like it, she's she's having a third it's the best it works out for her, and she's doing it.

13:43Speaker 1:Every child is a blessing, you know, I'm getting really biblical.

13:47Speaker 3:I really are.

13:48Speaker 2:If you want to love it, it's so great.

13:52Speaker 4:Are always going to give you the app you wanted, and you're going to go now and try and have a third child.

13:57Speaker 2:Yeah, you will child more.

14:02Speaker 1:If you have love today's episode, please leave us a positive five star review, follow us on Ready or nott Pod, Send us your conundrums, and if you have answers for any of these listener questions, particularly the fussy food one, because we get this quite a lot, please send them in. We would love to hear them. See you next week.